Fangirl Review #1 Amnesia Memories -Toma Route- {SPOILERS}

So I couldn’t just not start with this! I’ve been dying to talk about this route {OUR FIRST ROUTE MIND YOU} and in more detail than my displeased rant in episode 10. And from what I’ve seen, so many fangirls of Amnesia (weeaboo fangirls probably in their mid to late teens} love this boy and this route. And when I was looking at reviews of this on Steam, the thumbs down reviews had some serious criticism that I took into mind before buying this game.

When I first heard of this game, it was actually due to the anime which I heard the opening “Zoetrope” or “Zeotrope”, which the internet seems to be unsure of how to spell. But its a FANTASTIC opening. Probably one of my top 3 opening songs ever for anime. It’s just such a rocking and mystical track with an opening that is kinda haunting, but then the guitar comes in and I just start singing along and can’t stop. I never did watch the anime though. I actually really got my first taste of the game from Dodger of Presshearttocontinue on YouTube. She ended up playing the Spade Route, which she got a bad end and then barely picked it up again. But her Russian accent for Ikki is my canon, even though Suro’s drunk Ikki is the best thing ever.

So yeah I had a little bit of familiarity going in. Not much, but knowing at least one route gave me an idea of what the game was like. Needless to say with Toma’s route, I wasn’t expecting anything and got super frustrated. But if we had played Shin’s route first, we would have seen it coming. But that’s beside the point. Suro, on the other hand, had no interest in this game. She said it didn’t really look interesting to her, but after the first route we played, she was fully into it and I am really happy she was. It makes the playthrough so much better and we have made some great moments so far.

To talk about the route itself, I have to discuss the basic plot to the story, which isn’t too hard to understand, in a sense. This game is in the genre of “Otome” or a dating sim for Ladies. Basic formula is all here in it as well. We are a nameless Heroine, literally in her head as most otome-games are. Our goal is to make kisses to your bishie of “choice” I say choice because you literally are on a linier path through a chosen route and you cant really deviate off that chosen boy. And of course the core mechanic of a visual novel in general is to make choices and progress the story by the things you say to said bishie boy. You’ll get one ending of a few as you make choices, one good, one normal, and ultimately between 2 and 3 bad endings.

I will talk about my main problems with the game as a whole when I am finishing the final route’s review. But the color of the issues will show up as you read, so patience for now! But the main story of Amnesia Memories is that as the Heroine (who I named Alix in our runthrough after my high school character that was based on a card theme), you were just minding your own business probably and a little spirit kid thing named Orion knocked you the hell out and ended up stuck in your subconscious where your core memories are located. With no way out, except the gathering of memories back to you which will separate the 2 of you, he swears he will do anything he can to help you get through your daily life and get the important memories back.

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Mainly a good portion of the opening is Orion telling you basically not to trust anyone because “humans have horrible intent” and Heroine can’t be taken to a hospital because its not a mental or physical reason your memories are gone, just his existence, and if you were to end up in a hospital or not getting the stimulation to gain memories back, you’ll be a potato. That itself is a reason to not get in trouble and find yourself in a bad situation. But my main problem with Orion, even if he is a ball of adorable and is a good mouthpiece for us and our thoughts, he tends to point out the obvious and always, and I mean ALWAYS, remind us that you can’t trust your boyfriend person because you don’t wanna end up in a hospital. It’s repetitive and tends to make us go “We know already! We saw the last scene.”

Our first real choice to get the full story going is a list of worlds that you were in, and in doing so, the route you will choose to pursue. The routes are all labeled in a card suit, in the order of Heart, Spade, Clover, and Diamond. There is a secret route we will get to later. When we started, I asked Suro which one she’d like to do, thinking we’d start from the top and work the way down, but instead, we chose to go from bottom to top. So to Diamond world we go and onto Toma’s Route!

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So blonde bishie boy was our first one, with the name Toma (which haunts my dreams to this day). Here we start by passing out in front of him and end up in the hospital. But before we pass out, we get a strong memory of us and said boy and Orion is pushed out of us so far that we almost disconnect. AND this is where I thought that just choosing the route was gonna get us to a bad ending. Already in the hospital, apparently only for injuries, but still it was what made her and I freak out. Three days waiting for an MRI machine to be fixed, Orion ends up coming back to us and we can see him again…lovely. All the while not getting much information about the strange guy who was claiming us as “family” and taking good care of us, yet not staying long enough to chat and give us more info about who he is to us.

He takes us home and after admitting we have no real memories of the things that happened, he explains that he is an older brother figure to us, and we also have another close childhood friend, Shin (who ended up becoming my favorite character because of Suro’s valley girl voice for him). We live alone with no family around right now. So yay.

We search the room of our studio apartment after getting back and having a conversation with Shin and Toma and taking the night off. When we search the place, we find out that it is August 5th now and discover a notebook with the words “meet Ikki @ back alley” many times. Not sure who this person is, we ask Toma to take us there. ANNNNND this is where the contradictions of the story really start becoming apparent. Said back alley holds a memory of us admitting we liked someone in July.  When we fall over from passing out, Toma is holding on to us and we ask like a dumbass “Did I like you?” For some reason, Toma says that we were a couple.

But I will just say right here right now, I don’t know if it was meant to be a thing, but the fact that they don’t stay consistent with this through the entire route is a frustrating thing. Everyone says you stopped seeing him. And the whole time, people say that you were never going out and even TOMA says that he couldn’t see you as anything more than a sister when asked to lay with you. GOOD GOD. I really cant tell if it was intentional to see that Toma isn’t really being truthful with you through the route, but I got so annoyed. I get that this is the route we were suppose to be most suspicious with the person for not telling us stuff, but I couldn’t stand it after a bit.

Ok, that problem become a little more understanding if you played Ikki’s route. But the thing is that Suro had no idea and I knew pretty much what was going on once all the shit with the mailbox started happening. But when I saw it was just pranks, I was expecting..more. Because later on when I get to Ikki’s route as a review, I’ll probably reference this. Thing is, the progression is suppose to start from top to bottom and you get more understanding of what’s going on. I figured that doing Shin’s and Ikki’s routes would have prepared me for the shit Toma does.

Back to the mailbox, people are suddenly filling it with things like dead bugs and condiments…and the purpose of it is really dumb. More on that later. So we are worried only slightly by it, but it isn’t until after we meet a mysterious man who tells us that we will die, and a random flowerpot almost falls on us to realize something is SERIOUSLY wrong with the situation we are in. That includes that we were suppose to work at our job and Toma tells the manager (who doesn’t have a consistent personality, which is always really fun), that we need to take more time off to recover from our time in the hospital.

Toma after realizing bad things are happening, takes us to his apartment and tells us to hold up here for a while. We stay for a few days, Toma taking our key to our apartment and going out. So at this point, you are like “ok, this is hella suspicious and I want to know what the fuck he is doing.” All the while with all of this, Toma is showing his on-and-off affections for you. One minute its lovey and then the next “oh the sister shit gets in the way of me actually falling for you”.

 

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My face every time this happens. Always.

One day you just wanna go home. So you decide that while Toma is passed out from college life, you’ll go check out the apartment. The mailbox is fine, so into the apartment we go. Finding a diary, we take it with us. When we searched the first day, you couldn’t find the battery to your laptop, but luckily its just sitting out randomly. Turning on the computer….onnnnnnly to find that we are getting not only, and I mean NOT ONLY death threats in the laziest variety, but also somehow, we got a bunch of messages from people asking for sex and favors. I was kinda hoping that we were actually that type of girl and did the sexy stuff in real life. Alas, dreams crushed.

 

Of course we receive a scolding for going out into the dangerous world like a 5 year old. Gotta love it…ugh kill me. But the scolding lasts less than a few minutes because we are going SHOPPING! And while I was really really hoping that lingerie store wasn’t somewhere you had to go, it was. Though Toma’s face is priceless as the counter girl forces him to watch us trying on pretty softy things. The best line comes from Orion after the whole thing.

Alas the enjoyment out of the route was starting to fall after this point. The lingerie store it for me. But in flashback form, we see that Toma was going to school to be in the legal profession, which seems really ironic in a sense. His sense of justice and right and wrong is really warped, and you’ll understand shortly.

We sneak out again like an idiot and Toma catches us, gets angry and takes us back to his apartment. Of course, he gives us a drink and we pass out. Again….and again. Orion was sensing something wrong, and watched the douche put sleeping pills in our drink and advises us not to drink it. At this point we had no idea what the hell was going on and I was starting to get nervous thinking that we picked a wrong choice to lead to a bad end. Shin comes over, trying to vouch for us to get out, but Toma is starting to act like a creep, downright threatening that if we listen in on a private conversation, he will knock Shin out and imprison both of you there…but somehow he convinces Shin to leave us be. This pissed me off because his reasoning for doing this could have been explained to us, but NOOOOOO it adds to the mystery and makes you wanna keep playing.

One kiss and medicine forced in the mouth later….

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You know, I want to say that I think, being in the BDSM community and understanding why people would find this Yandere route kinda hot, I can’t say I like it at all. Its not just the fact that you are in a cage. It’s that this is beyond your will and Toma starts acting like a creepy mofo. I was so angry after this because I can’t imagine how someone could love a person like this. Just the social aspect of this is enough to make my blood boil.

So I am gonna go off on a rant here. Maybe this is gonna sound dumb, but I might as well make this a thing. Toma is shown to care deeply about Miss Heroine. But when he goes Yandere, I just cant even see how anyone can think this is ok. I get that having a serious want to care and protect, but to be this shady and this out of touch is horrible. I will go off on a limb and explain the best ending soon. But I must say this straight up: TOMA IS AN ABUSER. She might have been in love with him, but this is not a poster boy for a good relationship at all. It isn’t just in this route either that he isn’t a good person either. Shin’s route is kinda the same, but more on that another day.

So yeah, you literally are stuck in a cage and I have to make decisions that I REALLY don’t want to make because I no longer think this boy is cute and I would rather throw him off a cliff (huhuhuhu). But within a few days of talking to him and trying to love him, you find out that you can get out of the cage because a bar is bent, so we get out and take our cellphone, which promptly dies when we try to use it. A day or so later, we decide we are gonna go to work and try to meet up with Ikki so we can get an explanation for things we don’t know. So we escape (with badass music), and end up running into the mysterious bro who, with scary, tells us he knows a shortcut to get us to where we need to do. We did it and get thrown down a well and get a bad end. LOVELY!

So we went back and tried the other option to run, you nearly get run over by a motor cycle, injuring us. Thinking we should go back to the apartment, we end up running into Toma. If you chose right up to this point this won’t happen and you’ll just go back to the apartment, but we unfortuantly chose enough bad ones that put us on ANOTHER bad end path where Toma goes all-out crazy and takes us back to the apartment, chains us up and forces us to stay. In this, we don’t find anymore memories and he basically gives us the rape face and promises us he will always take care of us….

I was so mad because we had to restart entirely to get a good end at this point. So we did and I finally get to talk about the best ending and why I think our Heroine has a horrible taste in men in this universe. So if we chose right, we go back to the apartment a minute before Toma does and (with creepy eyes) he sees that our shoes are scuffed and our clothes are ripped.

We have to take off our clothes, except our underwear, and then the fucker forcefully tries to get his point across, all while causing us pain (I want him to die) and telling us that it doesn’t match the pain he feels. I LOVE when horrible people do this. SHE IS LITERALLY HURTING AND YOU ARE BEING A BASKETCASE. I WISH TO SWAT YOU WITH A CINDERBLOCK. A memory of him always promising to protect us comes in and when we call out to him, he lets us go. We fall into a shelf and magically our diary opens up to exactly what it needed to. I must say, how convenient.

We end up finally hearing the whole story, about how we didn’t really want to be a little sister to Toma anymore and how we were asking Ikki for love advice. We decide to stay away from him for a few months and the day we lost our memories was the day that we were meeting up with Toma for the first time in a while for a date so to speak. We are actually truly in love with him and with that Orion reluctantly, and I really wish he wouldn’t have, leaves us in his care. He confesses his feels and we share the make outs and apparently everything is good?

ENDING {SPOILERY STUFF}

Well its not quite over because Ikki, which if you play his route, you will find out or already know, has a fan club, and apparently while we were talking to him and meeting up with him privately for help, the fan club went COMPLETELY apeshit and started harassing us. Apparently the whole time things were going on, Toma was trying to find evidence to get the fan club in trouble with Ikki, mainly because he thought we were dating Ikki. I feel like this part is just so out of nowhere. I know that it was given life throughtout the whole thing, but honestly I feel like with a story, you gotta go all the way or not at all. Like they could have had more involvement with the fan club in general. For instance we could have gotten a glimpse of Rika (the leader of the club) or at least one of the other girls. We NEVER got a view of them during this whole thing. I mean I know she got her hair cut in the crowd while shopping, but we never saw anyone. It could have been random chance. They didn’t make their actions very clear that it was the fanclubs true doing. If I never played this route before, I would have been confused by the hints. The fact that most people at this point would get to Toma’s route already playing Ikki’s and know that Ikki has a fan club. So the fact that they tried to talk like the fanclub might have been Toma’s?The problem is that once you bring that in, if you already played Ikki’s, it TOTALLY ruins the story for you.

For a newcomer like Suro was, she couldn’t speculate, but once it got to that, it ruined it for me. So yeah, maybe it would have been better to just go all the way and show the sprites or whatever? I dunno, I feel like I am nitpicking, but it really made me lose the illusion.

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The end basically comes with the fan club apologizing and gonna try to fix the problems they caused. In the final moments, we get an ending of a short conversation with the Heroine and Toma, her saying that the bar was broken (which really struck me as stupid that he was surprised with it. You saw she was injured, idiot), and them kissing to end the route. Fucking blow me game.

FINAL WORD!

I will start off by saying, I was in really bad situations of mental and emotional abuse in the past. Including into the final month when me and my current boyfriend got together, I was dealing with a manipulative and abusive person who was using my want to leave home and start a new life against me. I wont go into too much detail about the past, but I know an unhealthy relationship when I see one. And I am probably gonna say this, while most of the routes have unhealthy themes on the surface, like being neglected, being in a relationship even though you don’t think well of the other for something they did, and so on, NONE OF THEM were as bad at Toma’s. People call this route “kinky”, and while I see why they would think that, I have to bring out my main channel teaching stuff here, BDSM is about consent and communication. If people are claiming this route has anything of the sort, you are dumb as hell.

The Heroine had no clue what was going on for obvious reasons. Toma ended up using that like Orion predicted. I know that his intentions were good, but that doesn’t justify anything he did. Confining her to his room would have been good if he told her what he thought was going on. And drugging and locking her up was REALLY not necessary. Honestly, Suro said she can see why people would like this route, and I do to a degree. But I wouldn’t want my boyfriend doing anything like that to me.

Girls, if your boyfriend isn’t being decent, doesn’t treat you right, hurt you, if you are crying more than you are laughing, he isn’t worth it. And if he is literally hurting you, causing you pain, there are people out there who can help. Don’t put up with that crap. Get the help you need, and know this, there is ALWAYS better. Be brave! Because I love you ❤

This route left me feeling frustrated. There were a few major problems with the characters not really holding to the things they said, a lack of real “antagonist” motivation (I say that with air-quotes because technically they are the true antagonists, but you really don’t realize that until the end), and honestly after playing the last few routes, this one just felt kinda lazy in the end. This really did solidify my hate for Toma through the rest of the routes, and after Shin’s I can say officially he might be one of my most hated characters in video games, just because of how personally I felt uncomfortable with the things that were happening. So overall I think I would give this a really low score, but since I haven’t figured out a scoring system yet, we are just gonna say it gets 1 Snowcone out of 5.

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~The format of these reviews might change later on. But I hope you all enjoyed this at least a little 😛 More to come soon~

-Kelliann

 

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